Series: THE MESSAGE OF THE CROSS
Aim: to understand the perspective of Mary during the crucifixion of Jesus.
ICEBREAKER QUESTION #1: What is your birth order: that is, are you a first-born, last-born, middle child, only child, etc.? And did you have brothers, sisters, or both?
DISCUSSION QUESTION: How do you think your birth order influenced your development as a person? In what ways did your relationship with your siblings make you who you are?
ICEBREAKER QUESTION #2: As we go around the circle a second time I’d like to expand our focus: does your extended family (including aunts and uncles and cousins) get together very often for occasions such as holidays or birthdays or family reunions?
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: 1. When you were growing up, were you especially close to any of your cousins? And, do you still keep up with any of them today? 2. Many cultures tend to place a much higher value on extended family relations than do Americans. Do you ever visit with any of your second cousins or great-aunts or great-uncles?
TRIVIA QUESTION: What would you guess is the most widely observed family holiday in America? ANSWER: Mother’s Day – it is observed by over 95% of all Americans.
DISCUSSION QUESTION: Do you feel the bonds between a mother and child are different than those between a father and child? If so, in what ways?
In today’s lesson we will learn there was a sort of “family reunion” at the foot of the Cross. And, while Jesus only makes seven short sayings as he dies, one of those messages is for his mama!
TURN to the gospel of John, Chapter 19. READ Verses 23-24 LEADER’S INSIGHT: Appropriating the clothes of a condemned man was considered one of the “perks” of an executioner. We don’t know for sure, but – the seamless garment of Jesus could well have been made by his mother. If it was, this was yet one more source of personal pain for Mary that day.
READ Verse 25 The woman referred to only as “his mother’s sister” is most likely Salome, the mother of James and John. This would make James and John the cousins of Jesus.
Background Note: This identification is based on the fact that Salome is named among the small group of women who were witnesses of the crucifixion (Mark 15:40) and who attended to the burial of Jesus (Matthew 27:56).
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DISCUSSION QUESTION: If James and John were the cousins of Jesus it might explain why their mother felt bold enough to come to Jesus and ask him to give her sons the “top posts” in his coming kingdom*! Knowing that background, how do you suppose Salome felt as she stood with her sister Mary and watched the execution of her nephew Jesus *See Matthew 20:20f.
The first woman named in verse 25 is, of course, Mary, the mother of Jesus. DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: 1. Jesus was the Son of God, but he was also human, and Luke 2:52 tells us he grew and developed just like any other young man. We also know that Jesus grew up in a big family: he had four brothers and at least two sisters (see Matthew 13:55-56). As Jesus was growing up, do you think his mother Mary treated him any differently than she did her other children? 2. Would you suppose his step-father Joseph treated him any differently?
DISCUSSION QUESTION: Jesus was the oldest of at least seven siblings. Do you think his birth order influenced him in any way?
READ Verses 26-27 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: 1. How do you suppose Mary felt when she heard those words? 2. Why does Jesus call her “Dear woman” instead of “mother”?
DISCUSSION QUESTION: John was often called “the disciple whom Jesus loved” (John 13:23; 19:26; 21:20), so it doesn’t surprise us that Jesus trusted John to take good care of his mama. But we also know that Jesus had at least six siblings. Why, then, didn’t Jesus entrust his mother Mary to one of them? Why do you suppose he asked his cousin John to look after his mother instead of one of his own brothers and sisters?
Possible Answers: They may not have been in Jerusalem at this time, while John was standing there beside her; Jesus may have been concerned about his mother’s immediate safety and security; The brothers of Jesus were, at this point, unsympathetic to his claims (see John 7:5; cf. Mark 3:20-21), although after the Resurrection they became believers (see Acts 1:14; cf. 1 Corinthians 15:7); Jesus came to create a spiritual family, and relationships within the body of Christ may sometimes be even closer than our physical family ties (see Mark 3:20-21 & 31-35).
DISCUSSION QUESTION: As the firstborn son Jesus may have felt an extra responsibility for his mother’s welfare, because in the Jewish culture it was a sacred duty for a son to take on the responsibility of his aging parents. Do you believe people today feel that same level of responsibility to their parents? Why, or why not?
LEADER’S INSIGHT: The second message of Jesus from the Cross reminds us that one of the most basic teachings of the Bible is to “Honor your father and your mother.” Usually that commandment make us think of small children being obedient to their parents, but here Jesus is a grown man and his mother is an aging widow.
DISCUSSION QUESTION: What does it mean to YOU to “Honor your father and mother”? What would you say are some practical ways we can honor our parents as they grow older?
SUMMARY STATEMENT: The second saying of Jesus reminds us that, even while he was dying on the Cross, Jesus was concerned about his responsibility to take care of his mother! It also reminds us that Jesus was not the only one who paid a price that day; his mother Mary also suffered because of his sacrifice for us. Background Note: See Luke 2:25-35.
NEXT WEEK we will consider the third saying from the Cross, as Jesus turns to the thief and says, “Today you will be with me in Paradise.” To prepare for that conversation, read Luke 23:35-43.
© Dan Williams